blood, blood, go away

Well, today I had a dr's appt to remove another mole I have. I have lots, just a part of my genes. Anyways. In 2005 I had one removed behind my knee. Pretty easy...They numb the area and just cut the sucker off. Well, more like slice. Anyways, today I was having that done to another one on my other leg. So, the dr says "I'd like to take a look at the one we removed in 2005." I said "ok."

He decides that since he only cut the part that was sticking out, he said he'd like to just cut into my skin and get all of it out. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???? I didn't sign up for that!

So, he stabbed me twice with a needle to numb both the areas. First comes the one from behind the knee. Not bad at all. Then the other one, no biggie. I leave.

As I'm walking to my car, I'm on the phone with J and I realize my leg feels wet. (the one where he removed the rest of the mole). I pull up my pant leg, I'M BLEEDING! Blood is dripping down my leg. J thinks it's hilarious. Of course, I call him a jerk. So I'm trying to hurry up to my car, but if I walk too fast, the blood comes out more. I finally make it there, take off the band-aid, and search for a tissue. Luckily, I had some napkins in my middle console. I start applying pressure but this thing just won't stop. I go through one napkin, and grab another. I call the dr's office. She told me all I can do is just apply pressure and eventually it will stop.

I sit in the parking lot with my leg propped up and applying pressure for 5 minutes. I decide this is ridiculous and drive back to work. I check the knee, still bleeding, but not as bad. I wobble into my office (luckily my co-worker and boss are gone) and check it again. Not bad, I think it's done.

I go to the bathroom to clean off my leg. Afterall, I gotta be cute! I'm going on a date with J tonight. I go to wipe off the blood from the wound itself BAM! Starts bleeding again. WTF?? I didn't know water attracts blood???

I'm back in my office now, It's been about 20 minutes since the procedure's been done. I think the blood has finally stopped. But I'm no fool - I'm not letting water anywhere near this thing for a week!


I did make it through...

It's been awhile since I posted, but Yes, I survived the lasik. I thought that I was going to have a coronary during the first part of the procedure. But, luckly the assistant, Janice, was EXTREMELY comforting and held my hand the whole time. I suffered from a huge case of claustrophobia. See, they put these lil clear thimble looking things over your eyeballs. And while a laser is probing tiny lil holes (to make preforation marks) around the eye to make a "flap,", the plastic thimble guy is suctioning your eyeball, and then BAM everything turns black. (and yes, the eye is open). It didn't hurt, but mentally I just freaked out. The second part of it - the actual lasering to correct my vision, was so quick and painless. But still had some sort of freakout because you can see everything they're doing.

Of course, in the end, it's all worth it. I've started the whole eye drop regimine that is to last about a week. My vision is clear, but it is also filled with a halo effect around white/light objects. This will go away as the cornea heals. As the Dr. explained it - if my cornea was a big sheet of metal, the laser was a hammer and made all these dents in it. Now, as time goes on, the cornea will smooth back out and therefor decreasing the halo effect.

Not sure if it's related - but I have noticed that ever since I had the procedure, I've had the WEIRDEST dreams. The first night, I was shot - twice. I was some sort of agent and was watching these two guys and about to shoot them. I shot once, missed, and they didn't know where it came from. I shot again, hit one, then the other came after me and shot me once in the leg and once in the chest.

The next night I had a dream and I was stabbed, twice (again). This time it was in the knee cap then in my abdomen. It was weird because I can still remember the sound it made as the knife entered my flesh. I don't know what lead up to the stabbing, but something did.

Last night was the weirdest night. I was going down some sort of water slide thing, but I was clothed. All of a sudden this worm is just laying on the slide. It's a thing that looks like the peanut worms the contestants on Survivor just had to eat. Anyways, I see it, pick it up and start twirling it around. I let go and it flies off into the distance. I continue on the slide, and all of a sudden i start falling off. I end up in the water, and then this huge snake weird thing starts swallowing my legs. Then I woke up. Weird, huh?? I wonder what it all means.....


Low-Level Anxiety

Yes, I have and will be battling that all day today. Since my Lasik procedure is tomorrow, I'm a bit anxious. I know nothing will go wrong. But I can't shake these jitters. Plus I had some coffee this morning. So THAT didn't help. I think now the caffine has left my system and I'm just back to the regular anxiety.

I read over the documents for the pre-post op rules. Basically I can't wear any sort of perfumes or scented lotions on the day, and then afterwards there's a whole laundry list of do's and dont's. Do wear the protective eye gear at night while sleeping for a week (ugh). Don't get soap and water in your eyes (so i'm wondering how I wash my face??) Don't rub your eyes for a month (THAT'S hard). Do use the eye drops as directed (2 different kinds, 4 times a day). Don't exercise, heavy lifting, strenous activity for 5 days after the procedure. Do keep your eyes closed for at least 5 hours after the procedure (and the valium will also help me sleep that whole time. lol). Don't wear eye make up for up to 4 weeks after procedure.

Man. I'm so worried I'll rub my eyes. I've noticed I've been doing it a lot more than usual this week. I think it has to do with the fact that I haven't been wearing eye makeup so I'm not worried that I'll rub it off.

Am I worried that I'll lose my vision completely? J asked me last night what would happen if I go blind (thanks for the support!!). What would happen if I did become blind? How would I work? Would I even be able to? I know you can get all those softwares and stuff, but still. See, this is why I have anxiety! lol. Man. I just need to stop thinking about it...And perhaps take a sleeping pill tonight so I don't stay awake!!


killing 30 minutes

Well, I'm at work, not feeling like working. I would go home, but I can't. I have an eye appointment in a half hour and it's on this end of the valley. I suppose I could find something to do, but blogging is more fun.

Well, I went out Sunday night for J's bday...with my glasses on. I felt like everyone was staring at me like I had a third arm. I know that glasses are a normal part of life at times, but I just hate them. I took them off for every picture taken, although there might be a few with them on. I must destroy them.

At work I got a call from a woman who I wanted to give a job to. Last week I found her resume online but she said she was already contacted. I told her to give me a call this week if she doesn't hear back from them. Well, lucky me, she didn't hear back from them. I ended up sending her a few openings to look at and hopefully she'll let me submit her! Oh, if you're reading this, and want to, send me your resume at findmework2day@yahoo.com. We place people nationwide - all kinds of things from admin to supply chain, engineers and scientist.

Anyways, another thing that boggled my mind today I am frustrated with, but I just don't know how to solve. I was accused of something, but it was a complete misunderstanding. But I feel the person needs time to cool down and regroup because anything I say won't matter. They still have the first thought of me in their head. It sucks, but a normal part of growing up? Hard to say.

J's bday was yesterday - he turned 25. For the past 2 months, he's been giving me a hard time becuase I was the older woman - but now we're the same age. How did we celebrate you ask? Well, besides the crazy weekend, on his actual bday, he drove some friends to the airport, I stayed home (wasn't feeling well). He got home, we watched some Tivo (Bones). And at 9pm, he said "You ready for bed?" I said "yep!". So we crawled into bed, watched some Two and A Half Men and then lights out. I definately felt old....


They're off!

Well, I got home about 15 minutes ago and threw away the contacts! I'm super sad, and that's super lame.....

Day one will start tomorrow with the glasses. I haven't worn them for daytime in over 9-ish years. So, this should be an experience. And with the whole 80 degree weather and sunshine - should make it interesting since I can't wear sunglasses! But it's only for a week....I guess I can survive???

Last day...

Today's the last day I get to wear my contacts. Starting tomorrow morning (or actually tonight when I take them out) I have to wear my glasses in preparation for the lasik procedure I'm FINALLY having done a week from today. I'm not going to lie...I was a little sad putting in my contacts for the last time this morning. See, I've been wearing glasses since I was 8 years old. At first when I'd complain to my mom about not beeing able to see the chalkboard, she thought I was lyiing to get attention - as it started about 4 months after my dad decided to leave my mom. I don't blame her because if that was my kid, I'd probly think the same thing. But soon my teacher confirmed my complaints and a trip to the eye doctor occurred. So, for the first 2 years, I only had to use them to see distant things. When I was in 4th grade - I started having to wear them all the time. And it just got worse and worse. Finally in HS I was able to get contacts. Possibly one of the best things in my life.

Now, with how my vision is today, I'm pretty much blind - no exaggeration - without any assistance with glass/contacts. With nothing in, I can't see past my nose clearly. Everything is a huge blur. When people don't believe me, I give them my glasses to try on. They say it feels like they're 10 deep and drunker than a skunk. So then they believe me. But, I can't help it! I started asking my optometrist about Lasik a few years ago. He basically told me they have 2 requirements: 1) over the age of 21 and 2) have 3 consecutive YEARS of the same prescription. So, every time I'd go there, I hoped that it wouldn't get worse. But it always would. Finally, and amazing thing happened - It was the same for the 2nd year. And then this year - same!! So we finally went through with getting things arranged.

Now the time has come. I have to wear my glasses for the next week, and the procedure is next Friday at 12:30. J is taking me. I'll be there for roughly 2 hours with all the testing before and after. The procedure itself lasts only 15 minutes. Then I'll be sent home to sleep for about 5 hours, then start taking eye drops (2 different kinds) every 4 hours. For a week. Ya, that sucks
but it'll be worth it!

So, I'm about to finally start a new portion of my life - perfect vision (hopefully!). Even now with my glasses/contacts, I don't see clearly. The doctor said that with my high prescription (-8.5 and -9 for contact wearers) it's hard to get it to be 20/20. But, he did say that the chances of my vision being better after the procudure is increasingly good. Yaaay!!!


Valentine's hangover??

Well, it's the day after Valentine's day - hallmark holiday, whatever you want to call it. Not an alcohol type of hangover, but could be many things - chocolate hangover, love hangover, sex hangover? Whatever the cause for it, do people over do it on Valentine's day? Do guys go all out for that day, then say "phew! back to normalcy" today? I wonder if spousal abusers give up on the abuse for the day, then start back to beating the shit out of their significant others today. (I'm not stereotyping that men are the spousal abusers, because we know some women who could pack a mean punch!) I wonder about things like this. Yes, it's way out there, but I still do.

J loved his gift! I got him an Ipod shuffle and had it engraved. It was actually his bday gift (it's on the 19th) but with some drama surrounding the gift, he got it early. I got a one hour massage :o) I'm going to be booking that for the day before we depart for our cruise next month. I'm going to get all pampered and get in the mindframe for the cruise. I'll explain that whole thing later.

So, back to the Valentine's discussion. The place Shortie and I decided to go to is a small Thai restaurant by my house. I wasn't expecting a long wait (if any) but when we got there, the place was packed! There were 3 tables on reserve, and one couple that got there before us. Luckily there were 2 openings, so we were sat immediately. We enjoyed great food, great conversation, great company. Our check came, we went back to my house, had some champagne and some red velvet cake. It was a great evening!

So, happy Valentine's hangover day to you!


Waiting around...

Well, I'm pretty much done with my work load for today. My sister's boy called today (not quite her boyfriend, but more than just a friend) and he wants me to let him into her room so he can decorate it with roses and other things. So adorable. How can I say no? So, that gives me the excuse to go home early.

Random things happened at work today. My co-worker in VA (she works in our corporate office) introduced me to a new slang - "mise." Basically, it's the equivalent of might + is. When I told her I'd never heard of that before, she said "oh, you weird California people!" Um, 'scuse me. But mise???? Seriously?

When I told my boss, this conversation ensued:

Me: Have you ever heard of "mise"?
Boss: No. what is that?
Me: Well, H said it to me today. She said I was ridiculous for not knowing that.
Boss: Sounds like ebonics to me!

I laughed so hard at that. Not sure why. But I did. I think it's just one of those days. No, not having a sugar high either. I haven't had any chocolate either.

I also learned another word: competimates. What is that? Well, it's a combination of competitors and teammates. Basically, it's as if you have a competitor in your work force (like, Ralphs and Vons) but your team up to work on something together. I don't know how they'd work together though (Ralphs & Vons). But I guess if they were both sponsoring some big fundraiser? Anyways, that was my 2nd word of the day.

One last one I learned - Bailey-wig. Not sure what it means, nor if I even spelled it right. But my boss was writing an email and wanted to know how to spell it (he does that a lot - asking me how to spell something). I didn't even know what it was, and I still don't! Maybe I'll google it one day....


Fun to be a housewife?

While I'm not yet married, nor engaged, I've suddenly found myself living the life of a housewife. I love J to death, and I don't particularly mind doing all these things. But, I just often find myself looking for distractions from the chores. Yesterday I did relax while J cooked (he's fabulous like that) but as soon as he headed out for a work thing (we often spend many evenings separated due to his job), I got started on stripping the bed, washing the sheets, washing the duvet cover, cleaning up after dinner, running the dishwasher, getting ready for the gym....But yet I have many hours of Tivo (actually the DVR version from Dish Network) and another night - tonight - to deal with.

I'm staring at a large load of whites/lights sitting on my bed, as well as the clean duvet cover that needs to be put back on (in?) the down comforter. I should also frost the cake I made for Valentines day for dessert but it's still just sitting on the counter. So many things to do, yet I just want to sit around. I have Idol on behind me. I keep pausing even from this to watch it.

But, I guess that no one really jumps for joy with the thought of housework and cleaning. If you do, then you should seek immediate help. lol. Now I think I've started rambling. Oh crap. J just got home and I still have all those things to finish!!! I better go.....


Sweets and the Gym

Not likely combos if you ask me. I believe when you go to the gym, it's typically to work off the sweets you've eaten in your lifetime. Anyways, so i've started up my gym routine again. It's been over about, 2 years since I've gone regularly...or at all. I mainly go to feel "in shape" and not like a sack of potatoes. I used to work full time in retail - so didn't really need the gym. Walking around so much, lifting boxes, etc, really do a great job for maintaining strength. Well, when I graduated college and quit the retail world, I now sit down for 8 hours straight and maybe walk 100 feet. Yes, it's pathetic, but overall it's a much better scenario than before!

Anyways, back to the gym. So, I started going to see if I can get back on a routine and eventually promote myself to a nicer gym - LA Fitness. There's a brand new one not too far from where I live and the overall gym and equipment is much nicer and the place overall just makes you want to spend all day there. I know, I got a free one week pass and went with Shortie. So, I reactivated my membership with my cheaper, smaller, less fancier gym and am currently in week 2. (the first week I was supposed to go but got too busy).

But, for some reason, whenever I'm done working out (not with a class like pilates or spin - but just working out the old fashioned way), I really want SWEETS. One time I hit up Jack in the Box for some breakfast jacks (I had 2). Last time I wanted to devour a whole carton of ice cream (no, I wasn't pms-ing), and today I regret my decision to NOT buy the E.L. Fudge cookies that I almost got earlier today at the store. So, what brings this about? If I had been a fitness major in college, I might know. But I studied Psychology. Perhaps it's some of my synapses going off in the wrong part of my brain?

But, unfortunately this time around I don't have anything really sweet at my house. I mean, nothing to satisfy the craving. No cookies. No ice cream. No cake (but i will after I make one tomorrow for Valentine's day). This sucks. To spend 45 minutes working out just to pig out? DUMB!

Brief about me

Well, I've dabbled on and off for the past few years with online blogs. I love them, then get bored, so I stop, then want to try again. That cycle has now repeated for the third time. Here's a brief about me..

I'm 25 years old living in Southern California where there are more sunny days than gloomy ones. I'm in a serious relationship with a guy I was friends with in HS. He just moved into my place full-time last month. I work as an admin and have tried my turn at recruiting, not sure where I'd like my job to lead me. I graduated from college with a degree in Psychology a few years ago, and I have a crazy family.

I talked my friend Sweet Shortie into joining me on Blogspot. She's going to be a contributor to this blog, as I will be on hers. Ok, enough for now, time for me to do some work.....Yes, I multi-task with my job and also surfing the net, updating myspace (I'm a self-proclaimed addict) and now, this.


blogger templates | Make Money Online