Today's events - great? Not so much.

Well, obviously work started off like any other Friday - but it wasn't a payday Friday. Those are the best. You know you just received a deposit of hard-earned cash. And bill collectors are just awaiting their cash...Not that I have the kind of bill collectors that call me. Just bills in general. Everyone wanting their share.

Anyways, yesterday I got word of 2 different employees from managers. The first came to work on Monday, then didn't show up the rest of the week. He did call, and said he was in the hospital, but didn't ellaborate as to why. The second - he just hadn't shown up at all. My job? Find them.

I spoke to the one who showed up on Monday. Apparently he bought some fish from a wholesale place (I guess a cheap Costco knock-off?) and got food poisoning. He had been sick all week, only living off alka-seltzer. Sucks to be him. Anyways, he told me he'd be at work today. Well, got a call from his manager - apparently he didn't make it in. His phone now says "I'm sorry, this subscriber is not accepting phone calls at this time."

Great.

So, the other one, not sure what's going on with him. I called his emergency contact, and it was his son. He said he hadn't heard from his dad in awhile. And, still haven't heard from either of them.

So, around 2:45, my boss gets the Spring Fever and decides we all need to vacate the premises immediately. I still have work to do though. So, I hurry, pack up my stuff, and we're all out of the door by 3:15. The following events occur

3:20 - arrive at CVS to get ant spray, toothpaste, and a new toothbrush. I'm stoked because I had a $2 off coupon on oral products (keep it clean kids) and then a $3.50 off total purchase. I basically got the toothbrush and toothpaste for free.

3:27 - drive past the DMV. Realize I should go in there and update my license to remove the restriction regarding the lenses. Obviously, I'm seeing like a normal person. But, I keep driving.

3:41 - (yes, i'm making up these times, but I think they might be pretty close). A shit-head accord seems to want to pass me on the on-ramp for the freeway. I think "Back off!" and floor it. But, I don't really move that fast. I wonder "hmmmm..."

3:46 - Wow, traffic's moving for a Friday. But it's 3:46...Shouldn't these people still be in work? I keep driving

3:49 - Shit, something's not right. Move all the way to the right to the lil side fake parking area.

3:49 (and 30 seconds) - Hmm. That's a weird sound.........

3:50 - Park. Decide not safe to exit driver's side. Jump across E-brake. Leave car. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK. First EVER flat tire. And I'm on the damn freeway!

3:53 - Call J. Get voicemail (more on this in a bit). Call Honda's Roadside Assistance. Go through all prompts, and speak to a real human. He tells me that I'll get an automated message telling me the ETA for the person to put on my spare. (Yes, I'm a girl, I have no jack, and I'm not doing this on my own).

3:56 - Call J again. Still getting voicemail. Ok, for the side story.....J had to be at work at 4am today. He got off work at 1:30 and ate, then went to bed for a nap. Obviously he must have his phone on vibrate, and can't hear it because the poor guy is exhausted.

3:57 - Call R (co-worker). She asks me if I'm ok. I say yes. I'm not even freaked out (surprisingly). All of a sudden, I have to go. Someone came to help!

3:58 - Metro Freeway Service Patrol guy gets out of his car. He's there to put on my spare! Yay! I learn, though, that he didn't get the call from Honda. He just found me on the side of the road. Yay!

4:15 - Spare's on, MFSP guy leaves. I head on to Costco to get new tires. I am told it'll be 30 minutes, so I stroll around. I then decide to buy this book. Maybe I was just fed up that I was trying to live off of 36 bucks till next Friday (payday). So, I'm currently reading this.

4:45 - Head home. It's so good to be home. J's still sleeping. I check his phone. It's on fucking SOUND!!! I tell him Thanks. I was just on the side of the road and called you twice. He's all grogy. He doesn't get it. I say it again. Then the apologies start flowing. But I'm (surprisingly) not angry. After all, he did get up at 3:15....


So, that's the extent of the day. J and I headed over to my landlord's for a bit. 2 hours later (and also dips, veggies, and shrimp, oh, and he had scotch) we're home. We decide to play cards outside because it's nice. Great relief after the almsot 100 degree temps today (where the hell did THAT come from?)

So, I'm going to be old and go to bed. It's not even 10:30 on a Friday. Oh well!

Reality check

Well, last night I hit the wall of reality. I realized that for once in my life, I have no huge plans for the future, no change will be occuring, and honestly, it's kind of boring. I've moved every year for the past 5 years basically. There are many things I want like any other 25 year old, but I just can't swing it.

Where I live, I'm not really tied in with a lease. I signed one for a year, but anything after that is wide open. The understanding with my landlord is that I won't be moving until we have to, and there are no plans on J and I moving anytime soon. Moving is an expensive task, and since there's no need, we're not moving.

Living in our 1 bedroom place is getting a bit cramped. I look around and see all this clutter and nothing I can do about it. J has a bunch of guitars and there's no coat closet or garage to store them. Right now, they're leaning against a small shelving/storage unit in the living room. There's also a few amps near them too. I've thought about going through the closet to reorganize and see if I can get more storage out of there. But, that is quite a task and it's Tuesday night and I'm not in the mood. Maybe Saturday, maybe Sunday, maybe next month.

I've realized I'm antsy. I have a few little things I can do to pass the time, but nothing huge. I can work on my scrapbook I have for me and J. Or I can work on this other mini scrapbook/photo album with our friends. But what I really want to do is plan a crazy fun trip. Last year we ventured off to San Francisco and stayed in a random, unfamiliar hotel. We walked around the neighborhood to find a good restaurant. We got lost on the trollies and ended up on the wrong side of town. We met up with some friends, had sushi in downtown, and ventured into a Japanese Kareoke bar (quite the experience...they rent out rooms by the hour!). We found our way to the Full House house. But none of that now.

Rent's too high, bills are too high. I know that this is the part of life that is the learning experience and of course I'd rather be dealing with this now instead of in 10 or 15 years when there's kids and a mortgage involved. It still sucks though.

My whole life has been one struggle after another. My dad left my mom when I was almost 8. He was sleeping with a neighbor. She had never worked a day in her life and all of a sudden her world crashed down. She struggled to figure out what to do for work. She hid her tears from us and always put on a smile. She kept us from knowing things were rough, but we knew.

I got my first job when I was 16. It sucked. I worked in a fast food mexican joint. I quit after 4 weeks. I then went and got a job working in a different fast food joint. This was better. The people were great and it helped pass the time. I went away to college and that was fun. I had to work a lot, and that helped build character, and kept me from drinking my life away.

I transferred back home, went to work in retail and quickly became a part of management. I maintained that while finishing up college, then finally moved on to a real office job. Now I find myself making decent money, but I don't feel it because I'm buried under debt. College debt, credit card debt, rent, the list goes on. New cars driving along the city streets tempts me to figure out a way to get one. My car's only 3 years old, but there are so many ways I can improve on it.

How do you fight the desire to just throw all caution to the wind and indulge in the cravings you desire? How do you become satisfied with living the same life day in and day out? I guess that's part of surviving your 20s. Lots of adults brag how their 30s are the best, and I think I figure it's because you've already gone through this crap, and you've learned from your mistakes and you make better choices. But, I still have 5 more years until I get to be in my 30s. I have 5 more years of learning, changing, and making my life better. So, here's to 5 more years!

14 day challenge...

Well, I got paid today. And it sucks because my next pay day is on the 4th, and rent's due on the first. So this whole check (plus some from savings because one paycheck can't cover all the rent...) will be used up for that. To be safe, I already wrote out the check and will be pretending that I paid rent. Because, well, if I don't, when may 1st comes around, I'll really be hurting.

So, my challenge for the next 14 days is to only use whatever's left in my checking account. Sad as it is, it's a whole 36 bucks. I do have money in my savings, but I HATE taking money out of there. I am not a saver, but I like to just let it sit there. I put money in there a bit ago, and I want to see how long I can keep it there. lol.

So, what's that mean for me? Well, for J too. I do the grocery shopping. We don't get a lot at the store, but we'll be getting even less over the next 2 weeks. Or, I make him go. But that doesn't happen. Also, no satisfying spontaneous cravings, unless it won't cost anything...or we already have something to eat at home.

It sucks, but that's apart of growing up, and the struggle till you become financially stable. If that's at all possible....

I still can't focus

I am having real issues focusing on work today. I only have an hour left of work, but my mind checked out at noon. This sucks.

Side note: Oh man. See, I'm having ADD again. Because 10 minutes ago i knew what that side note was. Now, nothing. Dammit...

3 hour dinner.

Well, last night I went to dinner with a friend I haven't really seen since January. We ate, caught up, dished about boyfriends, friends, new things in our lives. All of a sudden, we realized almost 3 hours had passed when her boyfriend called her to say good night. We both said our goodbye's and headed home.

During dinner, one of the topics that came up was about breast augmentations. I swear almost every woman in this town has had one. Even teenagers and twenty-somethings. Ever since high school I always wanted one. Not for the reasons you might think. I know my reason affects many woman out there. I just am tired of dealing with it. J tells me it's not noticeable. I think it is. Then, on the cruise, a guy said "ya, I can tell." Thanks. I wasn't really upset, because he was just being honest. That's what I really wanted. So we both talked about it. Her reasons are slightly different than mine, but the end result would be the same.

In high school, I said I always wanted to get it done right away, like after college. Well, I graduated 3 years ago and I'm still the same. Back then, I never thought about getting the Lasik procedure done, but look at me now. I did it. I didn't save anything for it ahead of time. With using the flexible spending account offered through my employer, I'm taking a hit each month with a lowered net, but at least it's only for this year. By time Dec. 31st rolls around, all $3800 will be paid off.

But, unfortunately, you can't use an option like that for a cosmetic surgery. I wish. I could deal with another year of lowered paychecks and just putting the rest on a credit card. I really wish I could save up for it. But with rent, bills, car payments, student loans, and "fun" items, it's not easily accomplished. J and I talked about it last night, turned into a bit of a disaster...Not that bad, but more of a misunderstanding that resulted in my feelings being hurt. Mainly because I'm a girl, and it's that time of the month.

So, we talked about how he doesn't feel I need it (I told him it's more that I want it, and he can't understand how I feel about the insecurities). But, he was also asking how would I (we) pay for it because of how tight things are now, and how we want to get married, and we'd have to pay for it. Also bringing up the point that eventually we have to move to a bigger place, buy a place, all these things. I understand all his points. I know that there are other things that need money, but this is also something that I've wanted for almost 10 years. I get frustrated because my paychecks cover so much. And his don't. If his did, then it'd alleviate some funds, and allow me to save it for other things. It's just hard. and frustrating. That's all.

One other thing...

Happy anniversary to me and J. 1 1/2 years. woo hoo!

Couldn't resist last night...

So, J tried to make better of the disasterous meatloaf dinner from Monday... he tried pan frying it as really big hamburger-type patties. It sorta worked. It definately was an improvement. But, after dinner, and some Tivo, I decided it was time for dessert. But, all we had was easter candy and I wanted more. I convinced him to come with me and we ventured to Rite-Aid to get some ice cream and root beer. Yup! Root beer floats!! He told me he doesn't really like them, and then I played the girl card saying "but you've never had one from me!" It worked.

So, after being disappointed at Rite-aid (they didn't have ROOT BEER!), we got back in the car, drove across the parking lot, and bought root beer from Vons.

We got home, I made them, and J said "um, what am I to do? How do I eat this?" Men.

I let him know you use the spoon to eat the ice cream, the straw to drink the soda. He figured it out (he's so smart lol) and he told me he really enjoyed it. So, I'm going to have more tonight. It's so good!